Eddie
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Member Since: 7/6/2001

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Monday, October 01, 2001

Hi, yes I know I haven't been writing in this thing for quite some time. I am now very bussy with school. I dont get as much time to my self as I used to.

     Ok now to the point, the why to this when. I am getting pissedoff at this world. I am a good guy and I cant get a date to save my live, Yes I havent actualy asked anyone out in years, but that is besides the point. I feal egnored by the world. Lonely ness is the worst torcher that I have ever endured.

     Oh yea I have friends, but friends are just a distraction to the emty depthes that enclose me. I am sure everyone feals like there alone in a crouded room. I feal like I am gona have a fucking mob after me with torches.

     Oh and why the fuck cant I help any one??????

every time I try it is kicked back in my face it never fails. Some of them juse went back to their drinking, some went back to their parents. Others just went back to their shitty relationships.  I want to help in this world and I cant people wont let me.

YES I AM VENTING AND YOU SHOULD FEAL SORRY FOR MY KEY BORD CAUSE I AM HITTING IT REALY HARD.

I dont want to be here any more I dont want desire in my life, why is that some thing I cant live without?

Why cant I be open why do I have to think that every body is my enime and might try to kill me at any time. why is it that as the winds of time pass is every thing lost, but love.

Great now its getting hard to see the keys, they should make computer monitors with a built in clenex box.  :) I think I should quit while I am a head, befor I get realy bad thanks for listening, seams noadays that every body has more problems than me. 

see ya , oh yea and if you worry Ill give you a helecopter, like it or not.


Thursday, August 16, 2001

Whell I was trying to write my story earler but that dident work to good. An Icq friend from china was sending me stuff and when I looked at them the entrie page vanished. Oh well that is how it goes. I am not sure why but right now I feal realy down. I am willing to bet that its just emotinal buildup that happens to me from time to time. Or mabey I am just a genraly down sort of guy. any way Ill be ok I always am. boy some times I feal so worthless and unimportant, hell even feal that some times I have the plauge or some thing. man I gota chere up or Ill get to sad to type. boy I guess this is what hapens when you are pathitic like me. Oh and If I get one pitty response I am gona be pised I hate that every time I feal like shit I get pitty like I was looking for it. Not the case I just need to let things out some times. And one day I will find out what I am paying for, I hope I get it all payed up in this life. Oh whell I guess now Ive got my two readers woried, dont Ill be ok I just needed to get some things off my chest. Thanks for reading bye bye.


Wednesday, August 15, 2001

OkOK so this doesent work as easy as I thought,  so you will to read this you will have to go to the bottem and work your way up.

 Ok I gues I woulnt get to write on my story tonight I got the strangist message on line from a girl that lives in my town and I guess was intersted in a little ass, but I guess that she isent intersted or is having trubble with her computer, I am willing to bet its that she isent actualy intersted. I did the fool thing of sending her my picture. oh whell no biggy Ill live. well untill next time keep your gunn loaded within reach of some stupid ass so you can laff at him when he shoots himself.


Monday, August 06, 2001

Ok Ok By popular damand of all my two readers that wrote in I am going to continue my story untill I finish it , that might take a few weeks but It will be all in one pice more or less

    "Good we have little time to waist the night is fading to dawn and Id rather not stay out that late" She said as seh slowly turned for the exit sign mounted in the cealing. Like Moses parting the red sea with a wave of her hand the crouded dance floor opened to us like a fresh cut path through the wood. This display was unerving untill I realised that every one on the floor was keeping at least one eye on her. 

    Its hard to tell what your seeing on x you are prety sure its real and yet you get distracted so easy that reailty likes to snap around like a day dream in a movie and you still realy dont know what just hapened.

   Right now I was sure that I am walking slowly behind this beautifull creacher folowling her every step and I might add enjoying the view... We were aproching the bar now the music is a little softer here mostly so the bartenders can actualy take orders. The bar is strange like a cut out of some upscale 1920's bar that you could almost sware rotated behind the wall if there was trubble. there were four bartenders on duty right now there were six earler but things have died down sinse. there were only a few People sitting at the bar, a samll group of bikers who must have chrashed and clamed this as there turf for the rest of the night.

    One of those bikers who just hapened to be the bigest and ugluist of them all, and probely the most drunk. seemed to take notice of the beauty in foront of me with a four toothed smile he pushed his bulk of what must have been four hunderd Pounds. This masive biker was about six foot five with a large gut that hung over his belt he had a grying beard that covered most of his face and if it wasent for his sower disposition he could have been a great santa claws. I am glad he wasent wharing any red or I'd of bust out laffing uncontrolably. He was whereing the standard harly tshirt and blue jeans he was even whereing his biker jacket In this hot place nowonder he was cranky.

     I smiled at him, that was a bad idea. He must have caught me out of the couner of his lasy eye that kinda hung funny like he lamost lost it in a fight. Ok my first rule of x never vonlentear for a fight with any one cause every thing hurts more, alot more.

    " what the hell you looking at you little punk!?" he blared at me as if I couldent posably here him. Now I am not the biggest guy in the place, not even by a long shot,  but I am also not the smalest at six foot even I could almost look him strait in the nose without looking up. But I wasent dressed to intimadate tonight, I was whearing a pair of lether pants that were a little to snug and dident leave much up to the imaginationI also had on a dark blue tank top that said on the front in dark red letters " If I havent goten laid yet it just isent a party yet" hehe I like that shirt over that I had a lose hand made silk buttun up shirt that was iridesant in greays and blacks matching my blue grey eyes to a t. My hair is just long enough to get in my eyes but not quite to my sholders.

   My smile grew a little wider as he stomped over to me. Now he might out way me by one hundred and eighty pounds but I am no sloutch, when I was young my dad thought I needed to learn to handel my self so he made me go to kung fu classes with one of his church buddies. I liked it so as I got older I kept it up for five years. just last mounth I bested my teacher in informal compitition and he told me he had no more he could teach me.

    Just as I was about to give him a good tough guy line.  I noticed that the Erin grabed his jacket and puled him to meat her jade eyes. she wispered some thing to him and he turned tail and headed for the bar where he just quietly sat there panting like a dag when its hot.

    I sliped along side her and asked "What on earth did you say to him?" She smiled and replied " If your good I might just teach you that trick." 

    I let it go at hottie powers and opened the door as a gentil man. another good thing to do always be a gentil man It is just good for PR.


Thursday, August 02, 2001

Ok I am going to try some thing new tonight I am going to write an on going story every wensday and try to keep it up and I would like imput from my readers ok guys and gals.

      Music thundered in my head, the air on the dance floor was thick with the sweat of contained boddies. To bad this was the last DJ I wanted to dance some more. Hell I havent even found a pretty little morsle to go home with yet the night cant be over yet.

     Just then like some strange dream I could see this beautifull creature acros the floor. That was all I could use to discribe her, she was tall about 5'10" or so she had waist length black fine hair that seamed luminesent and reflected every ray light that hit her. Her eyes were like two pools of jade. Her skin was flawless like a porcilin doll. she was whrering a delactly embroiered tight red silk dress, it looked oriential Probely chinese. The dress complemented her figure perfactly like it was made to fit her and only her.

   With a slight smile she noticed me heel I am sure she couldent miss me I was down right staring. She started across the floor and she seamed to skip a second here and there as she aproched for what seamed like hours, but was only a few seconds. Kinda like slowmotion.

    I then noticed some thing strange, not a single person in the room noticed her becides me. Ok " No more extra x one tab one rave thats it from now on I think I am seeing things". I wispered to my self.

    "Oh no my dear boy you are not seeing things, you are just seeing me"  she said with one of those voices where you just cant place the acent .  "My name is Erin, would you like to come home with me tonight.

    My heart was thuding in my chest, and with each thud she drew closer untill we were almost touching not even an inch away. I just stared into those jade green eyes and said as frem and as steady as I could muster "Yes.. I would like that very much" ......

Ok tell me what you think I would like as much imput as posable. Untill next week byebye.



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